A'udhu billahi mina sh-shaytaanir-rajeem! Bismillah...

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Looking pretty, huh?

* Girl and Dad reading a book on rocks. * 
Girl: What's Gold, Papa?  
Mum intervenes: You are probably the first child from Malabar (North Kerala) to ask such a question ever. 

<< Malabar is known for its high volume gold consumption, especially within the Muslim community. If you walk into a typical Malabar wedding you are guaranteed to see the bride immersed in kgs of gold ornaments. 

I named Muslims here, because I am a Muslima from Malabar, totally frustrated at how this habit has rooted in my society while Islam never encourages it. Most of them know it, however, end of the day what matters to many is status/prestige/show off. Isn't that ironical*Not forgetting that there are exemptions, I just said the predominant side of the story.*  >>

Often, I come across people staring at me for taking Liya to weddings or parties without putting her on gold ornaments. At times, they say, "girls don't look beautiful without gold" or "she looks like he" etc. 
In my opinion, girls are NOT meant to look beautiful, charming to others' eyes or a show-off piece; they are meant to look "original", "not sophisticated". 
Why doesn't our society change, even with such a revolution it has displayed in the field of education, belonging to the first 100% literate state of India, with a very promising progress in women’s education? Still, it always teaches little ones that "your look" matters. And to see their beauty through others' eyes, not through their- own or failing to teach them that there are much important things to do as a woman than just being focusing on beauty!!

As a mum, I would want to teach my little ones - boys or girls: "it's not how you look that matters, rather what you do and how you do it make you a better person."

The future of our state, country and this world lies in the little hands and especially with our little women. But, they are constantly fed with stereotyped views on looking pretty as the ultimate thing to achieve and how would you expect them to turn out in future? 


  1. It's interesting that you wrote this post...we had a discussion about this about 2 weeks ago at home, and I told hubby that while men are not allowed to wear various types of jewelry many women are spoiled and ridiculous with their demands for gold and jewels. Allah would never want this.
    I agree. how can girls be more than just walking statues when the society does not let them.

  2. Well said Nishana. We can't keep going like this. Girls are not meant to be attractive to men. They have their path to walk. Beauty is not the most important thing, but it seems that around us and in many countries, it is what we keep teaching them.

    "it's not how you look that matters, rather what you do and how you do it make you a better person." I BELIEVE IN THIS TOO.


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