A'udhu billahi mina sh-shaytaanir-rajeem! Bismillah...

Friday, March 28, 2014

10+6 things I learned from my preschooler

1. Ask for what you need - more importantly  PERSUADE!

You can not persuade someone to do something you want unless you keep asking. Persuasion is not your cup of tea if you tend to give up. Ask in different ways, different times, use various tricks, end of the day you've to get the thing done. Persuasion is the ONLY key!

2. Walk the Talk, you've been radared

Have you ever heard "But Mum, you said not to do this the other day and you're doing it?". I am not ashamed to admit that I have been there and I was alarmed. Everything I tell her has been transferred to her play dolls while on a role play, and of course registered in her mind too.
They take after you bit by bit. They take you as their role models and try to imitate whatever you say or do. They are more curious on conflicts in our words and dos; finding faults out is easier thing to do. So, walk the talk or don't talk at all! 

3. Don't hold on with your whys - be inquisitive

Do not hesitate to ask almost anything that your mind questions. There is nothing like a bad question other than the ones never asked. Why is this uncle exercising? Why does that aunty supports her preggy belly with hands? Why is his belly that big? Is he carrying a baby?  - They ask almost anything you would never imagine or probably postulated as "embarrassing". 

4. Show your emotions 

Cry if you're sad, laugh when you're happy, throw tantrums when you're frustrated... Get your feelings out– happiness, sadness, worries, anxieties, likes, dislikes, disappointment, disagreement... or whatever it may be. Who said we should not be emotional? Humans are created with emotions. Showing is better than concealing. 

5. One next-door kiddie friend is a million dollar worth than your countless toys

Play at the park or bake a cookie? - Play outside with N,S and S!
Play outside or paint indoors? - Play outside with N,S and S!
Do a new craft or go out to play? - Play outside with N,S and S!
Watch a cartoon or go out and play? - Play, play play!
..and it never ends!

6. Clothes are not worn to impress others.

This is one thing I admire about kids. If you let them wear whatever they like, they can almost go with any weird mix-matching!

Yesterday, Liya selected a yellow frock to wear to school, with an odd dark purple colored pair of socks, black designer shoe, multi-colored stone necklace and a white hairband.  Do not care what people think about you as long as you don't feel the odd. 

At home she tends to go with funky combos - a sleeveless frock, never matching legging, a sweater on top of this, mum's scarf on her head, a hat on top of that, some hair clips hanging in wrong places... She feels happy with the mess. 

7. When you find your loved one all frustrated, give a hug! 

We adults, often, forget the need of physical bonding. A hug or a kiss can heal many wounds or conflicts. This is an important lesson I rediscovered from my angel. Those seldom moments when I get overloaded and float amidst umpteen "to-dos" or all my plans fall apart leaving me blank and my words or actions echo my frustrations, she would hang around me, smile, kiss on my palms and whisper "be cool Mamma". Everything melts away, I pull myself out from my tantrums and rediscover the reality.

If she is agitated or worried over something, she snuggles in to my lap - Snuggling do make things better, much better!

8. Accept people for who they are 

She accepts me the way I am, treats her dad knowing how he is and same is the case with everyone she loves.

Often, I watch those kiddie best friends at the play. They keep away from bully kids and treat younger kids with care and affection. When kids who don't speak English join them, I see them quickly switching to Hindi. 

9. Do it in your own way

Not always there is a fixed way of doing something.  Children's view of reality has little concordance with adult doctrines.

Rule of thumb: Whenever you can, define your way.

The other day we were attending sports day at Liya's school . K1 kids were participating in cool summer race. Everyone is suppose to run to a line fill a bottle with water given in the buckets and run to the finishing line. I was watching how each kid is filling the bottle. 

L- sitting calmly and filling bottle, focusing on not spilling the water and even placed the bottle inside the bucket to avoid spill– perfection is the focus.
Kid1- throwing water in the bottle, water is splashed everywhere and hurrying to reach the finishing line –  Goal oriented and competitive.
Kid2- watching how other friends are filling the bottle – Searching for inspiration, learning from others – A seeker, a learner!
Kid3-  analyzing the bottle first then slowly filling it – Analyze the situation, then begin to work; a good start is like reaching 90% of the goal. 

Meanwhile, in the finishing point, couple of parents were encouraging kids to fill in and run. They were busy exhibiting their personality. You know, I love it. :) 

10. Show your affection, love without limits!

It's always important to show how you love someone. Love is not to be concealed or cherished inside your heart alone. Show it, earn it and live a life.

It takes almost 5-10 minutes for her to walk out of the school after we arrive to pick her up because there are too many things to do –   give a goodbye to each friend separately, a tighter hug to every teacher, roam around and wave random byes to kids from other classes and much more.

She taught me  "Say, I love you so much" to the one whom you love, no matter how many times you said it before. Nobody gets bored of learning how much they have been loved.

11. Forgive and forget

How often we adults live in the past and recollect how someone had hurt us. But, watch the little ones with their friends. They play together, conflict, get annoyed on something, and whine or whimper. However,  after a couple of minutes they play together, again! They don't register hurts into their hearts. 

12. Slow down and relish silly, beautiful things around you...

...smell the flowers, rake those dry leaves, pick pebbles, dig in the mud, trace the ant-trail, splash in the dirty puddles, smile at the moon, blink at the stars... Every next opportunity you get, make best out of it. If you hurry up, you are likely to miss the little joys of life. 

13. A good book is worth reading 1000 times, sometimes, even more.

There are books in our shelf I read over and over in the same day, at the same sitting and again will be pleaded "can you please read 10 more times" then negotiating down to "may be 8 more times". You don't lose anything by reading a favorite book numerous times. Rather, every time you read it you tend to find different perspectives. 

14. Enjoy your favorite song even if it's playing 1789238th time. 

We have had songs playing in the car going on like walking in circles endlessly. Parenting is not meant for you, if you can't listen to baa baa black sheep, or 10 little monkeys, row row a boat and many many more playing in the car stereo when you are on a day long road drive probably off to your much anticipated holiday destination. :) 

15. A long silence is vital when you are making a massive mess 

Every parent I know endorses this. If you can not hear your child, there is something really really big happening behind the curtains. Head over and trace it. 

The coincidence I see is that so do we adults. I do get disturbed if silence doesn't prevail around me when I am engrossed in a serious task. Why blaming children? They are practicing to be "focused" little ones while doing something potentially important in their eyes. 

16. Keep yourself busy– an idle mind is indeed devil's workshop

They can get busy all the day, still be busy all night! They do a million things in a day, they don't get bored of doing something. Be busy, be active and be happy. Active are the people who are happy. You can do a billion things!

What are your learnings? 

Linking with Po.Co.Lo and Magic Moments


  1. I loved reading this post. Every word is so true, looking through the innocence of a childs eyes somehow makes life seem more simple #PoCoLo

  2. Great post, my daughter is at an age where she wants her clothes to match perfect,so funny to watch :)

    1. That's the funniest age. My girl goes for matching too... But, she matches it in such way that if a tiny purple dot is there on a pink dress, she would match into that purple dot rather than pink.. :)

      Thanks for stopping by Claire. :)

  3. This is such da superb post! You've got such good observation powers, and it's a good idea to learn from our kids because they are such simple and sincere creatures.

    1. So true Tarana. Often, I get goosebumps on watching the extend to which their observations get into. Unimaginably talented are cute ones.

      P.S: Love your note on parenting now and then. :)

  4. Wow what a post - great points! The silence always reminds me of the time POD emptied a tub of sudocrem on herself and her carpet! I love seeing the world through POD's eyes although she tends to say she's done "nothing" when I ask her what she did at nursery/pre-school!

    1. I have built a beautiful image of POD in my mind through all serene pictures you showcase of her... Sudocrem on the carpet and body...I can totally relate to it. :)

  5. I love this post. And this is so true, sometimes my daughter is just like this! Children's view of the world is really beautiful.

    1. Not only that their view is different...that is very beautiful, peaceful and interesting too. :)

  6. So very very true! I think we can all afford to take a leaf out of a preschoolers book! Thank you for linking to PoCoLo x

    1. Life would turn out be much bright if at all we do so..:) Thanks Victoria. I enjoyed linking up there.

  7. This is such a lovely post! All so very true, and we can learn a lot from our children x

    1. Thanks for the comment and tweet Jocelyn. Love your story from the farm. I know you're learning loads from your little ones everyday. Have a great week!

  8. This is a gorgeous post and so true. I could learn a lot from watching my children.

    1. Joy, you parent four and I am sure you've had tons of learning everyday. :)

  9. awww this is beautiful! thank you for sharing and linking up with #MagicMoments xxx

    1. Thanks Jaime. Loved linking up there. Hope you're feeling better and getting good rest.

  10. Great post - just like my own pre-schooler. We should all live like this, the world would be a much happier place!

    1. You said that. I often feel that we all lose our innate wisdom as we grow up. ;)

  11. A great reality check on relationships with our children. Thank you for this

    1. It's my pleasure Fiona. I am sure you are learning in tons everyday from your bunch of kids and animals. I hope to visit your farm one day. (IA)

      P.S: Love the new addition to your farm family. Ebony is very adorable.

  12. We have as much to learn from our children as they do from us. Lovely post

    1. True, we learn from them and they learn from us. Learning is a never ending process, yet, what we both learn makes things different.

      Glad that you stopped by. Have a great rest of the week!

  13. Beautiful post. I was actually nodding while reading it cuz everything in the list is so true. #magicmoments

    1. Thanks Merlinda. I love reading your life with little boy. Sending smiles to both of you. :)

  14. I soo love the observations you've listed. We can learn a whole lot from our kids.

  15. Such a beautiful post, I can identify with all of it!


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